Relationships can be very hard if you do not have the right knowledge and skill set, it’s funny how we go through rigorous training and tests just to do somethings like driving while relationships are an exception, no wonder marriages fail woefully. The reality is people are not equipped or trained to have healthy relationships with others, a failed state or country is as a result of it’s bad marriages and relationships, families make up a nation or country.
The bible even says if the foundation be destroyed what can the righteous do, one way to look at this quote is, if the foundation of a country which is the marriages and family be destroyed can the country or nation stand?
It is never to late to learn what it takes to have a successful relationship, if you are confused as to whether you need a relationship coach or not, here are a few tips to guide you
1. You find it difficult to show or express love towards your partner
If for instance, little acts of expressing love is burdensome to you, then it means you have a hard time expressing feelings or letting go of your emotions, you need professional help because it might have been a long life thing that had occurred at a particular time in your life and has become a part of you, not dealing with will ruin present and future relationships
2. You equate sex as love
Sex is not love, if it was, there won’t be prostitution, if you find yourself only expressing love towards your partner sexually then your relationship is heading for a disaster sooner or later. Relationship is not about sex, it is much more than that. Relationships is more about support, companionship and growth
3. You have unresolved issues
Unresolved issues can be very detrimental to your relationship because it will creep up on you and take over, it has a way of blinding your judgement, for instance if you have unresolved issues about someone who hurt you in the past and have nursed it for so long, this issue will automatically make you feel or assume anyone you are with will do the same, so it will rob you of happiness you can or could have experienced with someone else. You need the help of a coach to help you get past this
4. Unhealthy habits
Personal unhealthy habits can also be an issue, watching porn for instance can ruin your relationship because it gives a false impression of how and what sex ought to be like, gives you unrealistic sexual pleasures which are acted and simulated by paid professional actors and actresses.
Gradually you get used to this feeling and will sort to live it out in the real world only to find out you cannot attain such pleasures then you start to feel your partner is not good enough because you have set unimaginable and unrealistic expectations, slowly you start to withdraw and look for pleasure elsewhere, cheating sets in, it’s a viscous circle which requires professional help
5. Fear of commitment
This is a common factor that indicates the need for professional help, fear of the unknown is part of what makes up how we all view life, at some point we are always wondering if we made the right decisions about things we have done and if we are about to make the right decision about what we want to do presently. In a relationship fear of commitment can make it not work because you go in half heartedly, a relationship requires 100% commitment for it to work.
Not in set in stone though, these are some signs that you may need the help of a relationship coach, if your relationship has been suffering for so long, it’s time to get professional help
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